Tired of the bullshit


I'm tired of your shit

Tired of your bullshit

Tired of you
Tired of your shit
Tired of your bullshit
Tired of you

Adam Ant. Bullshit 

2020. What a bloody awful year for humankind. Health, politics, brexit, furlough, proroguing, Cummings and goings, Trump, magas, farage, need I go on?

Today I read a paper on Corporate Bullshit, (thanks Roger!) the definition, the culture, its use and how to challenge it. It was an enlightening read in many ways, it’s always useful to have a reminder, given the amount of BS 2020 has turned up. 

In Confronting indifference towards truth: Dealing with workplace bullshit (McCarthy et al 2020) the concept is essentially that as long as a leader is not aware of the evidence base or facts, they can say anything without it being a lie, and the more they say it, the more they believe it to be true, and hope that their version or explanation of reality is accepted as fact. I’ve encountered way too much BS in 2020 that impacted on my wellbeing and health and am making a conscious decision to call it out as such ‘going forwards’ (urgh, can we ban that phrase in 2021 too please?). 

I’ve been wanting to write another blog for a few days, but the festivities of Christmas left me somewhat mentally exhausted by late afternoon. Of all years, this was probably the one where I needed a quiet one, and due to the household visiting restrictions, that’s what we had. It was really lovely. I had a bit of a wobble Christmas Eve worrying about expectations of having to chat and keep the mood light, but actually there was no need to worry, we spent Christmas in great company and really did have a lovely time, making use of FaceTime etc to keep in touch with those that couldn’t be with us for ‘the big day’.

So after three days of food and relaxation, it was time to hit the gym equipment again with TEC. Our last session on Christmas Eve had been a bit of a fun one as he allowed me to include reps of all my favourite lifts in the session. Never thought I’d have favourite lifts, that is for sure.

I’d followed it up with a lung bursting three hours on the bike, cycling up a virtual version of Mont Ventoux on Zwift. 1600 metres of climbing in 20km took around 2 1/2 hours of constant pedalling. The descent was significantly quicker, but left me feeling decidedly nauseous for the rest of the day!

Today’s session included a couple of new moves, including the first time I’ve had the barbell behind me on my shoulders. All went well and I followed it up with a hard ride on the bike, that saw my FTP increased to over 200 watts by Zwift. We’re doing three weights sessions back to back this week. We’ll see how my muscles enjoy it.....

I’m very aware that Christmas can be an incredibly tough time for a lot of people. I had some fears as to how I might react to it, but I’ve been very lucky to have not only tolerated and survived it, but I have really enjoyed it. A month ago I’d never thought that would be possible. 

The combination of medication and structured, supervised exercise seems to be working. I’ve been invited to start blogging about it for my local mental health trust’s staff intranet, another thing to look forward to, but also to hopefully get my grey matter further attuned to structured thinking. Hopefully, by sharing my own journey and thoughts, I can contribute in some small way, into improvement of our local services.

As I mentioned earlier, this can be a really tough time for a lot of people. If you think or know a mate is struggling, send them a message. Don’t push them for an answer, but don’t be afraid to contact them. Believe me, if there’s one thing I’ve learned this year, it’s to stay in touch with those you value and those that value you. You might not get an answer straight away, but you might get one eventually. Either way, it’s highly likely your message will be read and appreciated. 

One way of signing off is this.

“Please don’t feel any obligation to reply to this. I know how difficult it can be to deal with things when your mind isn’t right and I wouldn’t want you to feel any pressure.

Love and Tier 2 hugs
Blot 🎅








Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Music and friends come back into my life. Just for one day?

Image
I I will be king And you You will be queen Though nothing Will drive them away We can beat them Just for one day We can be heroes Just for one day David Bowie. Heroes  Today's lyric choice isn't sudden delusions of grandeur, it's simply the first song I listened to last night when I suddenly found myself able to listen to, and really enjoy music again. I'm a regular gig goer usually, I'd not be going at the moment due to my illness, regardless of Covid. But live music had better be around when I'm fit and the world has recovered from the pandemic. Get your hands back in the magic Serco money tree Rishi and support our musicians and venues!!! So yep, glimmers of light, music does influence my mood, so being able to listen really helps, as long as I'm reasonably careful on choices of tracks, I do like a lot of dark stuff, but can avoid it easily enough as I've a pretty eclectic taste.  My wife and I had a great initial meeting yesterday with Brent Kilmurra...
Read more

Drugs and Rock and Roll Discharge......

Image
  Keep your silly ways or throw them out the window The wisdom of your ways, I've been there and I know Lots of other ways, what a jolly bad show If all you ever do is business you don't like Ian Dury and The Blockheads. Sex and Drugs and Rock and Roll. Another night of really violent and frightening dreams. They seem so real it takes a while to comeback to the here and now when I wake and realise they were simply dreams. Felt okay, had a relaxing bath and a pretty chilled morning. I sat in the sun, in the back garden and jotted a few notes on my phone to remind myself what I wanted to discuss during my appointment in the afternoon with the Mental Health Crisis Team Consultant Psychiatrist.  2pm and I sat with my wife, or carer as her NHS label reads, for our NHS Attend Anywhere appointment. The tech worked fine this time, having crashed five times on the last appointment! DRUGS We reviewed progress and meds. Stop Fluoxetine immediately. Hooray! Reduce Diazepam. Hooray! Contin...
Read more

How long can I hold a plank? What is a dead bug and do I need a hoist for tomorrow?

Image
The new groups are not concerned With what there is to be learned They got burton suits, huh, you think it's funny Turning rebellion into money All over people changing their votes Along with their overcoats If Adolf Hitler flew in today They'd send a limousine anyway The Clash. White Man in Hammersmith Palais. Had to be up early today as my car was due to be inspected before being returned to the lease company. Congestion on the motorway meant the inspectors arrived two hours late, which meant delaying my scheduled training session. Felt my mood immediately drop, everything seems to be complicated and never goes smoothly. Once the car had been signed off and it was driven away I did feel some sense of relief as it’s taken over a month to arrange. It’s an odd feeling not having a replacement, but a car at this time is a luxury and until life returns to some semblance of normality, I'll live without it. It did at least mean I had time to have some food before training. I’ve ...
Read more